A New Year, A Gentle Return to Faith

The new year has a way of stirring things we thought we tucked away neatly. For me, this year isn’t about bold resolutions it’s about reconnection. Specifically, reconnecting with God after being angry with Him for a very long time.


Three years ago, my Dad passed away unexpectedly, and my faith took a hit I wasn’t prepared for. I didn’t lose belief overnight, but I did lose trust. I was mad. Hurt. Confused. I prayed less. I questioned more. And if I’m being honest, I kept God at arm’s length while still trying to move forward with life. Grief does that it reshapes how you see everything, including your relationship with God.


Coming into this new year, I felt a quiet desire to return. Not dramatically. Not perfectly. Just honestly. I didn’t need fire-and-brimstone faith. I needed something slow, steady, and safe.
Then something happened that I can only describe as divine intervention.


I was at Cream & Sugar Coffeehouse just existing, minding my business when I randomly ran into Pastor Joel from Endeavor Church. What makes this moment wild is that we had never met in real life. He didn’t know me personally. But he did see my LinkedIn post about Herald BeautyCON and felt called to support it as a logo sponsor. No agenda. No expectations. Just a genuine desire to help.


And somehow, out of all the places in the city, we bumped into each other over coffee.


That moment stopped me in my tracks. It felt like one of those quiet reminders that God doesn’t force His way back into your life—He gently places Himself in your path. Exactly where you are. Exactly when you’re ready to notice.


What I appreciate about Pastor Joel and Endeavor Church is that they don’t rush faith. There’s no pressure to “snap back” spiritually or pretend you’re okay when you’re not. It’s about community, reflection, and taking the journey one step at a time. And for someone like me who’s rebuilding trust with God after loss that approach matters.
As Black women, we’re often taught to be strong, faithful, and unshakable. But grief doesn’t always leave room for that. Sometimes faith looks like showing up tired. Sometimes it looks like asking hard questions. Sometimes it looks like sitting in a coffee shop, unexpectedly reminded that God never stopped paying attention even when you did.


"A new year doesn't begin with a change in the calendar.  A new year begins when you respond to the voice of Jesus inviting you to Come."- Pastor Joel McCauley


This year, I’m choosing to reconnect slowly. Gently. Honestly. And if you’re entering this new year feeling distant from God because of loss, disappointment, or unanswered prayers, know this: you’re not alone, and you’re not wrong for feeling the way you do.


Sometimes faith doesn’t come rushing back. Sometimes it meets you quietly with a cup of coffee, a conversation, and a reminder that grace has been waiting for you all along.